


Until Death Do Us Part

by nikogeeko



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Poetry, Unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-15 01:43:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7200461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikogeeko/pseuds/nikogeeko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>I pretended for a second that you didn't mind</i>
  <br/>
  <i>I pretended that wanting you didn't kill me.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Until Death Do Us Part

Oh my dearest remember the night you kissed me?  
I know your lips never brushed mine  
but I felt the vibrations of your laugh through the concrete floor  
traveling up the soles of my shoes until it echoed in my bones.

Blood never bothered you before  
at least that's what the papers say  
I mean, after so much death how could one really fear it any longer?  
Darling we never kissed but remember when you pushed me against the wall  
and I pretended the bricks were bedsheets  
and I pretended your anger was passion  
I can't remember what I said to you but I could never bring myself to regret it.

I wish you would say something more useful than  
_NO_  
maybe something like,  
_I NEVER HATED YOU_  
or perhaps even,  
_I LOVE YOU_  
Oh well at least on some level I know you didn't want me to die.  
That's close enough right?

Remember when I asked to be your friend  
A petty grudge gone too far.  
Maybe we could have fixed it all  
with some black eyes and bloody teeth,  
but death threats can't raise white flags  
and I was too fucking proud to admit I needed help.  
Now I'm laying on the bathroom floor  
and all I can hear is you frantically chanting  
_NO_  
as some prick keeps screaming  
_MURDER_

is it still murder if I'm already dead?  
I never really died  
but one day in the hallway your hand grazed mine.  
You never glanced up and saw me  
never jerked it away with a glare  
so I pretended for a second that you didn't mind  
I pretended that wanting you didn't kill me.

Because that's how it's always been hasn't it?  
If I didn't hate you,  
and I never did,  
Then I had to end up in love.  
Painfully, terribly, drunkenly in love.

I can taste the salt from my tears but for a second  
I delude myself into believing they are yours.  
They say love and hate are two sides of the same coin  
but you are the sharpened edge of a blade  
and I am the blunt fear of a risk not taken.

You refuse to meet my eyes anymore,  
but a schoolboys crush has no place on a battlefield.  
Maybe if I ignore the guilt  
my hands will finally stop shaking.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey this is my first published work on here so I'm p nervous not going to lie. I'm always open to comments and suggestions I won't get better if I don't know what to fix. I hope you guys liked it ?? Thank you so much for reading!!


End file.
